Eagle Christian Ministries

Have you ever wondered how one becomes hooked into drugs, alcohol or other compulsive behaviors?  The purpose of this article is to show how the choices we make to handle the stress in our lives may lead to harmful compulsions later on.  Dysfunctional choices always lead to ruin in the long term.

It begins with stress

All of us face situations in our lives that cause us to feel stress. Sometimes, we hardly recognize that we are experiencing it. It is hard to have a conscious awareness in the exact moment that stress occurs when we are facing it.  Unless what you face is rather severe, it is an unusual person who has the presence of mind to recognize that, “I’m in a stressful situation.”  Think about it, how many times after something happened to you did you later think, “Hey I was under a lot of stress back then”?  One of the ways that you can identify stress is to ask the question, “What’s alive in me right now?”  What’s alive in you is whatever you find your mind constantly thinking about.  Perhaps its constant arguing with a spouse or friend.  Perhaps its some situation at work.  Whatever is constantly on your mind is one of the stressors in your life.

Stress requires that we seek relief

Stress always requires that we seek a form relief so that we may feel comfort. We all recognize that when one of our primary needs is not being met, such as being hungry, tired, thirsty, or cold, that we’ll seek out ways of meeting that need.  What we may not realize is that this same principle holds true for the other stresses in our life as well.  For each stress, we will feel a compulsion to seek relief.  To carry this a bit further, we need to recognize that each day we face hundreds of little stresses.  We have bills to pay, telephone calls to return, errands to run, food to buy, work situations, relationships to balance, and so on.  Each of these stressors, in and of themselves, may not amount to much, or so we think; so, we don’t worry or give much thought to them.  But whether we recognize it or not, each of these stressors require that we do something to bring about needed relief.

Stress is synergistic

Synergy means that the end result of a set of conditions is greater than when we add each of the conditions together.  Stress is like that.  The tension we feel in our lives will always be much greater than it would be were we to add all the big and little stresses together.  So, when we think about it, we may now realize why it is that we can feel stressed out even when we don’t have a lot of big stresses in our lives.

We react to stress predictably

The longer we live, the more habitual we become.  The same is true about the ways in which we handle stress.  Some people develop patterns of avoidance and passivity while others may blow up, become angry and full of rage.  Over time, the ways that we handle stress become predictable, that is, we use the same methodology over and over again.  The pattern we use to handle our stress was developed, for the most part unconsciously.  Some say that it was developed in the early years of our childhood.

We choose things that feel rewarding

When we feel stress or pain, we will want to do something about it–we want to relieve the pain.  Thus, each of us will turn to some behavior that brings relief or feels rewarding in some way.  Some people may choose a behavior that causes them to forget or numb their pain such as drugs or alcohol.  For those caught in addictions or compulsive behaviors, our temptation is to act out in dysfunctional ways.

Some of us choose dysfunction

As said earlier, we handle stress predictably. The choices we make will either be functional or dysfunctional.  Another way of saying this is that we choose to react in ways that benefit or don’t benefit us in the long term.  You may wonder why someone would choose to react to stress in a way that is not beneficial for the long term.  The answer is simple, when we first make our choice, the approach doesn’t seem harmful to us.  In fact, it may feel wonderful and brings a sense of pleasure and euphoria.  For instance, those with sexual compulsions and addictions, make choices that feel good physically and give a temporary sense of emotional relief. The same is true of other compulsive behaviors such as drugs, alcohol, spending, risk taking, working and so on.

Dysfunctions turns into addictions

Once we find a convenient way of relieving our stress, we will turn to it again and again.  As we know, for every action there is a consequence.  At first we choose, then IT CHOOSES US! We become addicted.  Once we are addicted there are powerful  consequences that impact every conceivable aspect of our lives.  Every thing is thrown into chaos.

Addictions enslave us.

Slavery, captivity, and bondage may be defined as being held, against one’s own will, to the will or desire of another.  In the beginning, this slavery may seem pleasant enough; but, golden handcuffs still keep one captive and a gilded cage is still a prison.

Slavery is a dead end

Dysfunctional ways of handling stress always lead to ruin–especially so in the long term.  In the short term, we may feel some guilt or shame about what we are doing.  Later on, it becomes clear that our lives aren’t working so well.  Depending upon where we are in the addictive process, we may or may not realize that our choices are a dead end.

Dead ends don’t have to stay that way

At the Eagle Christian Ministries, we’ve all been there, done that, and ordered the tapes.  We know from experience the beginning, middle and end for compulsions and addictive behaviors.  We learned from experience that problems never get solved by acting out.  All of us know what it is like to be caught up in something or some behavior and not know how to get out of it.  We know what it is like to not know who or where to turn for help.  We want to assure you that you don’t have to live like this.  We hope you’ll contact us for help–that’s what we’re here for.